A duck walks into a bar and asks: "Got any Bread?"

Barman says: "No."

Duck says: "Got any bread?"

Barman says: "No."

Duck says: "Got any bread?"

Barman says: "No, we have no bread."

Duck says: "Got any bread?"

Barman says: "No, we haven't got any $@^*ing bread."

Duck says: "Got any bread?"

Barman says: "No, are you deaf?! We haven't got any $@^*ing bread, ask me again and I'll nail your $@^*ing beak to the bar you irritating bastard of a $@^*ing bird!"

Duck says: "Got any nails?"

Barman says: "No"

Duck says: "Got any bread?

ROFLMAO! Thats a good one!

Ok this one probably everyone knows by now.

WARNING: Some profanity

What do u call a bunch of black people running down a mountain?

A mudslide.

What do u call a bunch of white people running down a mountian?

Avalanche

What do u call a bunch of black people in a pool?

Coco Puffs

What do u call a bunch of black people in the ocean?

Oil Spill

What do u call a bunch of mexican people running down a mountain?

Jail Break

What do u call a black person in a church?

Holy Shit

When u wake up in the middle of the night and see a floating TV what do u say?

DROP IT N!GGER!


I have a few great adult jokes too but yea you're right, younger audience might not like it >_>

you're fine to put racist jokes

since it's just jokes

i even have adult jokes, but i don't think i'll put it here

too much younger forumers here

here's another joke


A female computer consultant was helping a smug male set up his computer and asked him what word he would like to use as a password to log in with.

Wanting to embarrass the female, he told her to enter penis. Without blinking or saying a word, she entered the password. She then almost died laughing at the computer's response: PASSWORD REJECTED. NOT LONG ENOUGH!!!

Im not sure if should say my jokes....they're kinda racist >_>

NOTE: I am not racist, the jokes are tho

A little old lady is walking down the street dragging two plastic garbage bags with her, one in each hand. There's a hole in one of the bags and every once in a while a $20 bill is flying out of it onto the pavement. Noticing this, a policeman stops her.

"Ma'am, there are $20 bills falling out of that bag."

"Darn!" says the little old lady.I'll better go back and see if I can still find some. Thanks for the warning!"
Well, now, not so fast now," says the cop.
"How did you get all that money? Did you steal it?" "Oh, no", says the little old lady.
You see, my back yard backs up to the parking lot of Lambeau Field. Each time there's a game, a lot of fans come and pee in the bushes and right into my flower beds! So, I go and stand behind the bushes with a big hedge clipper, and each time someone sticks his little thingy through the bushes, I say $20 or off it comes!"

"Hey, not a bad idea!" laughs the cop. "OK, good luck! By the way, what's in the other bag?"

"Well," says the little old lady, "some guys think I'm bluffing."

post any jokes!

i'll start the ball rolling.


A blonde walks into the library. She walks up to the counter, SLAMS a book down and screams at the librarian, - "This is the WORST book I've ever read!" "It has NO plot and far too many characters!"
The librarian looks up and calmly remarks - "So, you're the one who took our phone book..."