I feel like I have to vent and for those who remember me thanks and if I seem like a stranger I am sorry for that. I have been a fan of Utada for a while and feel that my life is blessed because I managed to see her in concert while millions of fans haven't had that experience. Yesterday marked a turning point in my life. To put it simply I deleted my audio file of her Chicago concert that I kept on my key chain for 4 years(OMG it has been 4 years!!!). I didn't do this out of hatred or spite, but more so an honest expression of me letting go of my fandom for Utada. I know this is sad and I can't really vent this to friends who wouldn't understand. I am not looking for sympathy and not even wanting others to be sad. I feel that I have to do this for closure. There are many things I would wish to say but in summary Utada has been a positive force in my life and I am thankful for the music she has made that has allowed me to endure so much. There are too many real problems that I ignore that I must focus on. Sometimes the help you have in the past becomes a crutch in the future. sigh... so to all those who love Utada I hope for the best and also I hope her career will prosper. Sayonara