Bill and Marla decided that the only way to
pull off a Sunday afternoon quickie with
their ten-year-old son in the apartment was
to send him out on the balcony and tell him
to report on all the neighborhood activities.

The boy began his commentary as his parents
put their plan into operation. "There's a car
being towed from the parking lot," he said.
"An ambulance just drove by." A few moments passed.

"Looks like the Andersons have company," he called
out. "Matt's riding a new bike, and the Coopers
are having sex."

Mom and Dad shot up in bed. "How do you know that?"
the startled father asked.

"Their kid is standing out on the balcony too,"
his son replied.





Little Nancy was in the garden filling in a hole when her neighbor peered

over the fence. Interested in what the cheeky-faced youngster was up to, he

politely asked, "What are you doing there, Nancy?"



"My goldfish died," replied Nancy tearfully without looking up, "and I've

just buried him."



The neighbor was very concerned. "That's an awfully big hole for a

goldfish, isn't it?"



Nancy patted down the last heap of dirt then replied,



"That's because he's inside your #&#&ing cat."