Ok England 1 Wales 0....... Don?t let the result fool you, this was not a football match it was a Donkey Derby......

http://www.doddinghurstdonkeyderby.co.uk/pages/home.htm

Well Donkey?s playing football .......

Fabio Capello insists his players no longer consider him an "Ogre", however Capello must have been ?Fee-fi-fo-fum?ing? it, as Joseph Jacobs poem: ?Fee-fi-fo-fum, I smell the blood of an Englishman, be he alive, or be he dead, I'll grind his bones to make my bread?........... two steps forward in Bulgaria were swiftly followed by ten steps back at Wembley, I know that Mr K will be Henry Kissinger with bells and whistles, that England only needed to draw, but the grim spectacle left a very grateful Capello a get out of jail free card for Montenegro.....well in fact a draw will do the business in early October...

You know ....had it not been for Robert Earnshaw blowing a glorious chance, England would have been denied a victory, in reality Wales exceeding all expectations, on the back foot after Young's first-half goal, only to stand aghast as Earnshaw when presented with the opportunity any youth team Sunday morning willy wonker would expect to put away whilst at the same time playing conkers with his cousin just six yards out, central position, keeper gone on holiday no longer at home, all Earnshaw had to do was to tap it in, inexplicably and to England fortune, a true water into wine moment, Earnshaw developed the equivalent of tin leg attached to a club foot a perfect example of a congenital talipes equinovarus i.e.a congenital deformity involving one or both feet , when the ball appears the players ?feet? or in Earnshaw?s case ?foot? appears to rotate internally at the ankle so side-footed it over the bar to the utter disbelief of David Speed sitting head in hands and the entire Welsh team mouths gapping like Venus fly traps.


Did anybody see James Milner or Frank Lampard, no I didn?t either rumour has it both were found dead in a river, wearing England shirts and women?s knickers, fishnet stockings, suspenders, and blow up dolls big rubber wobbly love truncheons protruding from where the sun don?t shine, but its ok the Metropolitan Police have removed their England shirts to spare their families any embarrassment.......GRRRRR

Well maybe I was a little too quick to call Arsene Wenger a tight wad .....

Arsenal owner Stan Kroenke has broken his silence on the Gunners' deadline-day transfer spending. Manager Arsene Wenger brought in Mikel Arteta and Per Mertesacker but Kroenke admitted: "There's a risk of going backwards if you overreact and start throwing money around in an attempt to solve your problems."......Full story: Caughtoffside.com

And as for Chelsea .....
Sunday, 18 September 2011, Barclays Premier League, Man Utd v Chelsea, 16:00.......It?s a biggie .....

Fernando Torres' Chelsea future questioned after 'critical interview'

http://www.metro.co.uk/sport/875260-fernando-torres-chelsea-future-questioned-after-critical-interview
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